Confessions of A Sniper (7)

每日一看---Confessions of A Sniper (7)

今天終於進入最後一部份了，一起來看一下這位狙擊手在拿槍之前的夢想是什麼吧！隨著採訪進入尾聲，TIME這位記者也問了最關鍵的問題---狙擊手對死在自己槍下的人到底有什麼感覺？我們來慢慢發掘吧！

Rebel fighters belonging to the Javata Harria Sham Qatebee watch over the enemy position during skirmishes at the first line of fire in Karmal Jabl neighborhood, district of Arkup, at the northeast of Aleppo CIty, Oct. 21, 2012.
2012/10/21阿勒波市東北方的奧克阿區， Javata Harria Sham Qatebee 叛軍與敵人在該區的卡爾瑪加柏打前哨戰。

He was not always like this. An avid boxer before he was the Sniper, the young man lived in Hamburg for five years, returning to his homeland in 2010. He attended the Goethe-Institut in Damascus and says his Arabic was so poor, he could barely read. It has since improved to the degree that he now reads the Koran aloud to his fellow rebels. He has long since shelved his dream of returning to Germany and training as a boxer. In fact, he doesn’t want to survive the Syrian uprising and is seeking “martyrdom.” “I’m only comfortable on the front line,” he says. “My rifle has become not just like a part of my body, it is my life, my destiny.” He remembers his religious awakening, in the first assault he participated in. It was a hit on a checkpoint on the road to the town of al-Bab on Aleppo’s outskirts. “We ambushed them. There was an Islamist with me. My heart was filled with faith. He told me the only thing between me and paradise was this road, was dying on this road. I was sorry that I lived.”
他可不是一直都這樣。在成為狙擊手前，他是一位年少又勁頭十足的拳擊手，在德國漢堡待了五年，直到2010年才返回家鄉。返鄉後，他加入大馬士革的歌德學院(註：歌德學院是德國設在其他國家、推動德文學習及文化培養的非營利組織)，並說他那時的阿拉伯文糟透了，幾乎不識字。但現在，他可以大聲朗誦可蘭經給叛軍的伙伴聽。同時，他早已把回德國繼續受拳擊訓練的夢想擱下了。他不期望在敘利亞內戰中活下來，反而在尋找「殉教」的機會。「只有站在前線我才覺得自在」他說，「我的步槍已經不是身體的一部分了。它是我的生命，我的宿命。」他記得第一次參與的攻擊行動中，自己有了宗教上的頓悟。歐貝位於阿勒波邊境，那次襲擊就是在通往歐貝一座小城的哨站。「我們埋伏攻擊。當時有個伊斯蘭同伴，讓我內心充滿信念。他說橫在我和天堂間的就是這條路，就是要死在這條路上。我很遺憾自己活了下來。」

A few days later, we returned to the issue of victims, of whether or not they are all shabiha, and his friend Mohammad. At the end of the day, I told him, he was a Syrian killing other Syrians. “I used to think about the people I’d killed, I’d think about their parents,” he says. “Yes, we are all Syrian, but we didn’t create these differences, they did. It is because I am Syrian, because these people, these civilians who are dying are Syrian, that I am doing this, that I am standing with and for my people. Those who are not standing with their people are not Syrian, they are traitors, and traitors must die.”

幾天後，我們的話題又回到被他殺害的人---不管他們全部是不是沙必哈---還有他的朋友，默罕莫德。那天結束時，我跟他說，他是一個敘利亞人殺其他敘利亞人。「我以前會想那些被我殺掉的人。我會想到他們的父母」狙擊手說，「對，我們都是敘利亞人。但我們(叛軍)沒有製造差異，他們才是。正因為我是敘利亞人，因為這些人們、這些市民是敘利亞人，所以我才這麼做，才和我的人民站在一起、保護他們。那些沒和大家在同一線上的不是敘利亞人，他們是叛徒；是叛徒就該死。」

And Mohammad? Was he a traitor? No, he said, he wasn’t, but “I’ve accepted it now, and nothing matters to me any more.”

那默罕莫德呢？他是叛徒嗎？不，狙擊手說，他不是。但「我已經接受事實，現在沒有事可以影響我了。」

“Whoever is going to be in my sights will die. That’s it,” the Sniper says. “My heart has hardened. I returned to religion, but after I killed, my heart hardened. A sniper sees who he kills,” he says, pausing. “It’s hard. A sniper sees his victim.”

「不管是誰出現在我的視線範圍內都得死，就這樣。」狙擊手說，「我的心已經麻木了。我曾轉向宗教，但殺了人後，我的心就麻木了。狙擊手看著他所殺的人，」他說，停頓了一下。「這很難。狙擊手看著他的受害者。」

A Syrian boy waits to be treated for injuries at a hospital in Syria's northern city of Aleppo after a shell, allegedly released by regime forces, hit his house, Aug. 24, 2012.
2012/8/24敘利亞政府軍砲擊擊中這名男孩的家。他在阿勒波北方的城市醫院等待治療。

A Syrian girl, whose family fled their home in Idlib, looks out of a tent tent, at a camp for displaced Syrians, in the village of Atmeh, Syria, Dec. 10, 2012.
2012/12/10一位敘利亞女孩從帳篷中往外頭看。他們一家逃離在Idlib的住所，來到位於Atmeh小村的難民營。

An elderly Syrian woman walks past graffiti reading "God is great" in the northern city of Aleppo, Sept. 14, 2012.2012/9/14位於阿勒波市北方，一位敘利亞老婦人走過寫著「偉大上帝」的噴漆鐵捲門。